It’s not many people’s favorite task to go buy groceries, but sometimes it seems like everyone else in the checkout line is there specifically to make your grocery shopping experience as miserable as possible. The line crashes to a standstill while you’re left holding a handbasket with the 5 simple items you wanted to quickly grab on your way home from work. It’s like these a-holes actually take pleasure in bringing you misery. Alright, not everyone is making a conscious decision to piss you off, but still, it sure does feel that way. These are the 9 seemingly deliberate ways people bend over backwards to disrupt the grocery store checkout line.
1) Arguing about the price after the transaction is already completed
What? Post Raisin Bran was supposed to be on sale for $2.29 and you’re pretty sure it rang up at $2.79? Wow, we better bring the line to a standstill while we immediately rectify this tragedy. Seriously dude, I will give you 50 cents to stop complaining and get the eff out of everyone’s way.
2) Trying to use every coupon in the entire Super Saver pamphlet
Yup, times are tough and every little bit of money you can save helps. However, that doesn’t mean everyone standing in line behind you has the patience to watch you hand over coupon after coupon so you can save 10 cents here and another 40 cents there. By the time you’re finally done ringing everything up, everyone behind you is left wondering if there’s a coupon somewhere entitling us to 20 minutes of our life back.
3) Deciding to pay with a check
We agree, debit cards are just too quick and convenient. It’s definitely better to write out a dollar amount, designate who you’re paying, sign something, and then make the cashier verify your license than to just swipe a card and enter a 4-digit code. We’re assuming these are the same people who have an AOL email address and talk about how buying things online is totally unsafe.
4) Running back to get one last item
Yes the 3 packages of chewy Chips Ahoy isn’t going to be a complete without at least a gallon of milk. But, the time to decide you need another half gallon carton isn’t when you get to the front of the line. Oh, you want us to all wait while you run (read: waddle) back to the furthest corner of the store to grab your missing item? No problem. We’ve got nothing better to do.
5) Paying for their groceries in several separate transactions
It’s just so adorable when couples shop together (actually, we can hardly stand it). We choose to tolerate your doe-eyed “lovey dovey” exchanges and stand behind your little schmoop-fest because we notice you only have about a dozen items. So, imagine our surprise when you start divvying them up into two separate piles and it turns out we’re stuck behind two people instead of one. What the hell? C’mon Couple That Does Everything Together, can’t you just pay together as well?
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