Breaking News: Buffets Make You Fat

It’s called “the buffet effect,” and a new study suggests it could cause you to overeat by as much as 10 percent. The theory is that because you’re faced with such a glorious array of food options, you’re likely to underestimate the portions of each, and suddenly 7 or 8 small tastings of various foods equate to considerably more than you’d ever eat of one individual food.

We’re thinking this hardly seems like a groundbreaking study, and take major issue with the idea that overeating at buffets is based on the diversity of foods. Our humble hypothesis is that the true buffet effect is all about the desire to get your money’s worth. Why else would people down huge portions of mediocre fish and chips at an all you can eat? It’s because for a fixed price you can eat as much as you want, and if you don’t take advantage of that you’re going to feel like a fool. A fool that can still fit in their pants, but a fool nonetheless.