1) He seems genuine.

While Rachael Ray laughs at her own ridiculous stories and Giada’s atrocious pronunciations grate on our very being, Guy seems very natural and genuine. No tablescapes, annoying flirtations or awkward pauses, just plain, peroxide naturalness. We’d like to have a beer with him, and assume he’d probably be similar to the Guy we see on TV.

2) Those catch phrases are, well, catchy.

So he likes to use oftentimes-annoying catch phrases in his shows. So what? We’re not ashamed to admit that we’ve caught ourselves using the “Flavortown” reference on more than one occasion. Plus, when he calls something “money” it makes us think of Swingers, which is an awesome movie.

While some may call his quotes annoying, we’d have to call them genius.

3) He makes tasty food.

There’s no way you can tell us that a cornbread stuffed meatloaf sounds anything but amazing. Add to that list a poblano stuffed with chorizo, shrimp and rice, spicy cherry ribs, and stuffed flank steak. Also, he makes a cocktail on every episode of Guy’s Big Bite, which we’re always happy to see (and drink).

4) The only Next Food Network Star to do anything of value.

Seemingly the only Next Food Network Star to avoid fading into obscurity, we’ve yet to see Aaron McCargo Jr., those two gay dudes, Melissa D’Arabian, and whoever else has won (we don’t even remember) make it onto primetime.

5) He hosts Diners, Drive-ins and Dives, which is awesome.

We’ve never been so tempted to quit our day jobs, pawn our possessions and buy an old RV to head out on a road trip and visit every spot Guy’s ever filmed on the show. It’s an obsession on Monday nights, and even if it’s considered a guilty pleasure, we’re so willing to admit it. If you think we’re wrong, then we don’t want to be right.

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