The Biggest Loser concluded last night, and after almost six months of intense workouts, diet, and incredible perseverance, Helen Phillips was crowned the winner and awarded the prize of $250,000. While supporting her achievements from the comfort of my couch by devouring some BBQ chicken and a slice of coconut cream pie, I couldn’t help but wonder if there was a less constructive way to celebrate someone’s dedication to weight loss. So, in an attempt to both make myself feel a little bit better, and also provide some pointers for anyone looking to pay a little tribute of their own, here are 10 ways to gluttonously celebrate someone else’s weight loss.

10) Rip a tiny piece of skin off your fried chicken and throw it away as a show of solidarity.

9) Eat a French fry for every pound you’ve watched someone else lose.

8) Make a silent promise to follow in their footsteps and then power through a bag of sour cream and onion potato chips.

7) Find a buffet and celebrate ’til the soft serve runs dry.

6) Cancel your carry-out order and get delivery instead. That way you don’t have to leave the house.

5) Use an actual pie to represent the person’s total percentage of weight loss…and eat whichever side is bigger.

4) Compete in your own marathon by eating something from every food court booth in the entire mall.

3) Show your support by eating lighter foods like whipped cream and cotton candy.

2) Apathetically gnaw on a giant turkey leg while giving them a polite nod of approval.

1) Down a 2,600 calorie large Oreo shake from Baskin Robbins.

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